Friday, April 29, 2005

JOKE OF THE DAY 29 April 2005

Love Stages

The L Word:

6 weeks: I love U, I love U, I love U

6 months: Of course I love U

6 years: GOD, if I didn't love U, then why the hell did I propose?

Back from Work:

6 weeks: Honey, I'm home

6 months: BACK!!

6 years: What did your mom cook for us today??

Gifts:

6 weeks: Honey, I really hope you liked the ring

6 months: I bought you a painting; it would fit the motif in the living
Room

6 years: Here's the money. Buy yourself something

Phone Ringing:

6 weeks: Baby, somebody wants you on the phone

6 months: Here, for you

6 years: PHONE RINGING

Cooking:

6 weeks: I never knew food could taste so good!

6 months: What are we having for dinner tonight?

6 years: AGAIN!!!!

Apology:

6 weeks: Honey muffin, don't you worry, Ill never hold this against you

6 months: Watch out! Don't do it again

6 years: What's not to understand about what I just said??

New Dress:

6 weeks: Oh my God, you look like an angel in that dress

6 months: You bought a new dress again???

6 years: How much did THAT cost me?

Planning for Vacations:

6 weeks: How do 2 weeks in Vienna or anywhere you please sound??

6 months: What's so bad about going to Istanbul on a charter plane?

6 years: Travel? What's so bad about staying home???

TV:

6 weeks: Baby, what would you like us to watch tonight?

6 months: I like this movie

6 years: I'm going to watch ESPN, if you're not in the mood, go to Bed,

I can stay up by myself !

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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
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from great leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

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18++
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Wednesday, April 27, 2005

JOKE OF THE DAY 28 April 2005

Alice was to bake a cake for the church ladies' group bake sale,
but she forgot to do it until the last minute. She baked an angel
food cake and when she took it from the oven, the center had
dropped flat. She said, "Oh dear, there's no time to bake another
cake." So, she looked around the house for something to build up
the center of the cake.

Alice found it in the bathroom, a roll of toilet paper. She
plunked it in and covered it with icing. The finished product
looked beautiful, so she rushed it to the church. Alice then gave
her daughter some money and instructions to be at the sale the
minute it opened and to buy that cake and bring it home. When the
daughter arrived at the sale, the attractive cake had already been
sold. Alice was beside herself.

A couple of days later, Alice was invited to a friend's home where
two tables of bridge were to be played that afternoon. After the
game a fancy lunch was served, and to top it off, the cake in
question was presented for dessert. Alice saw the cake, she
started to get off her chair to rush into the kitchen to tell her
hostess all about it, but before she could get to her feet, one of
the other ladies said, "What a beautiful cake!"

Alice sat back in her chair when she heard the hostess say, "Thank
you, I baked it myself."

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from great leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
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Or simply go Blogging @
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18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They
could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
subscribe at your own risk.

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Tuesday, April 26, 2005

JOKE OF THE DAY 27 April 2005

Are caterpillars good to eat?

Johnny: Daddy, are caterpillars good to eat?

Father: Have I not told you never to mention such things
during meals!

Mother: Why did you say that, Junior? Why did you ask the
question?

Johnny: It's because I saw one on daddy's lettuce, but
now it's gone.

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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
gems from the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings
from great leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
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18++
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could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
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JOKE OF THE DAY 26 April 2005

And older man was sidled up to the bar nursing a draft when another man
sits
down beside him an orders a pint for himself. The first one turns to
the
other and said:

"Excuse me for asking, but did I detect a touch of the old sod in you
voice?"

"Aye. That ye did."

"And what part of Ireland would you hail from. I ask because I'm Irish
meself"

"Ye don't say! I'm over from the Southeast, County Waterford it was,
and
Dungarvan was me home."

"No! I don't believe it! My own self, I come from Dungarvan. Barkeep!
Lets have a round for meself and me new Irish friend here! And what
part of
Dungarvan?"

"Hillbury street"

"No! I was BORN on Hillbury street."

A few more rounds and both are really in their cups.

"Tell me, now. Tell me. And..., and what was your mother's name?"

This brought tears to his eyes. "Oh, my Sainted mother, dead these many
years now. Her name, it was Mary."

Now the other begins to cry. "My mother too was named Mary."

Just then the phone rings and the barkeep answers: "O'Hallihan's bar.
Oh, you know, same old, same old. Business is pretty good, but
the
wife's mad at me again. Seems I don't pay enough attention to her.
And, oh
yeah, the Murphy twins are sloshed again."

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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
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from great leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @
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18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They
could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
subscribe at your own risk.

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Sunday, April 24, 2005

JOKE OF THE DAY 25 Apr 2005

Another Dumb Blonde

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night
he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas.
With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual
dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row
stands on her chair and starts shouting: ''I've heard
enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think
you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of
a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being?
It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected
at work and in the community and from reaching our full
potential as a person, because you and your kind continue
to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but
women in general...and all in the name of humor!''
The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize,

when the blonde yells, ''You stay out of this, mister! I'm
talking to that little jerk on your knee!''

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
gems from the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings
from great leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They
could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
subscribe at your own risk.

Join the 18++ mailing list @
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********************** Legal Disclaimer ****************************
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