Thursday, January 01, 2009

JOKE OF THE DAY 2 Jan 2009

 Bid a Fond Farewell
 
The boss is finally old enough to retire from the company. On
his last day of work, he ordered a farewell party for himself. The
boss wanted everyone to express their good feeling about him by writing
on the farewell card, so later he could remember how his staff "miss"
him. Most people are writing standard phrases like, "Without you, the
company will never be the same," "We will always remember you," etc.
Obviously the boss was not satisfied. "I need something from the
bottom of your heart, something really touching, you know. Okay, John,
you have been working with me for the last 20 years. You are my best
staffmember. I am retiring now. What do you have to say?" Slowly but
firmly, John wrote, "THE BEST NEWS IN 20 YEARS."

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

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18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They could
be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX. Statutory
Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it, subscribe at your own
risk.

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Tuesday, December 30, 2008

JOKE OF THE DAY 31 Dec 2008

 The Cook of the House
 
Are you a cook? Neither am I.
When dinner comes I only sigh,
Wake up the phone and his book
And let somebody be my cook. A pizza is a trusty meal,
A color frantic tasty wheel.
It disappears in your friends
And lets the party never end. But cooking is a tempting craft
And gazing down the oven's shaft
I start to wonder if I can
Create a dinner in a pan. The cooking magic I will work!
No more I'll be a takeout jerk!
I'll prove the world what I can be!
I'll make a meal for you and me. Momsense video
Into the kitchen with brave strides
I walk like wolf, who danger bides.
And looking back to high school days
I recollect my mother's ways. Spaghetti? Oh, that sounds good!
I grab the package where I stood.
Potatoes I shall add to that.
They'll make it better, so I bet. My mother always said to add
the veggies, but they make me mad.
To top it off I think I'll put
some oil in (I heard I should) I say a prayer, turn the knob,
And a blue flame begins to sob.
It's magic, that's why it's so blue.
It makes my tasty dinner
stew. It starts to boil soon enough,
And bubbles make the oil rough.
And lo-'n-behold it starts to burn
Just when it knows my back is turned. I quickly knew something was
wrong
When my stew's smell became too strong.
But no fear, my dear friends,
God blessed me with intelligence. All fires are quenched by water
thrown,
That's one sure thing I've always known.
So thinking quick I pour some in
And see a frightening thing begin. A fiery face came to my eyes,
It must be Satan in disguise!
It grabbed the stove in fire's grasp!
Behind I heard a frightened gasp. What happened next I won't describe,
my contractor charged me 15 grand!
Which Rachael Ray might have on hand
But never shall I cook again
 
 
<Happy New Year 2009\>
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ALSO PLAYING AT A MAILING LIST NEAR YOU ::

QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @   
http://quotationoftheday.blogspot.com/

WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @   
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They could
be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX. Statutory
Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it, subscribe at your own
risk.

Join the 18++ mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/18PlusPlus
Or simply go Blogging @   
   http://18plusplus.blogspot.com/