Joke of The Day

Useless Advice

A patient was waiting nervously in the examination room of a famous
specialist.

"So who did you see before coming to me?" asked the doctor.

"My local General Practitioner," answered the patient.

"Your GP?" scoffed the doctor. "What a waste of time. Tell me, what
sort of useless advice did he give you?"

"He told me to come and see you," replied the patient.

Enjoy
Chirag
:c )

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Joke of The Day

Ponderings!

* If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, why practice?

* If a lawyer and an IRS agent were both drowning, and you could
only save one of them, would you go to lunch or read the paper?

* If genetic scientists crossed a chicken with a zebra would they
get a four-legged chicken with its own barcode?

* Isn't it strange that the same people who laugh at gypsy fortune
tellers take economists seriously?

* Why is there always one in every crowd?

* If all the world is a stage, where does the audience sit?

* Is it possible to have déjà vu and amnesia at the same time?

* Why do hair shampoo instructions say "Lather. Rinse. Repeat"? If
you did this, would you ever be able to stop?

* Who decided "Hotpoint" would be a good name for a company that
sells refrigerators?

* How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?

Enjoy
Chirag
:c )

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Joke of The Day

A State Police colleague of mine once received a call from a woman
who asked him how to baste a turkey. After a stunned moment, he,
being a fairly good cook, described the procedure. Then he asked,
"But why would you call the state police to find out how to baste a
turkey?"

There was only a slight hesitation before she replied, "Well, you
knew, didn't you?" and hung up.

Enjoy
Chirag
:c )

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Joke of The Day

One afternoon, a wealthy lawyer was riding in the back of his limousine
when he saw two men eating grass by the road side. He ordered his
driver to stop and he got out to investigate.

"Why are you eating grass?" he asked one man.

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied.

"Oh, come along with me then," instructed the lawyer.

"But, sir, I have a wife and two children!"

Bring them along!" replied the lawyer. He turned to the other man and
said, "Come with us."

"But sir, I have a wife and six children!" the second man answered.

"Bring them as well!" answered the lawyer as he headed for his limo.

They all climbed into the car, which was no easy task, even for a car
as large as the limo. Once underway, one of the poor fellows says,
"Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."

The lawyer replied, "No problem, the grass at my home is almost a foot
tall."


Enjoy
Chirag
:c )

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ur name, please send a mail to me at chiragg4u@yahoo.com for the
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Joke of The Day

A member of the United States Senate, known for his hot temper and
acid tongue, exploded one day in mid-session and began to shout,
"Half of this Senate is made up of cowards and corrupt politicians!"

All the other Senators demanded that the angry member withdraw his
statement, or be removed from the remainder of the session.

After a long pause, the angry member acquiesced. "Okay," he said, "I
withdraw what I said. Half of this Senate is not made up of cowards
and corrupt politicians!"


Enjoy
Chirag
:c )

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ur name, please send a mail to me at chiragg4u@yahoo.com for the
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