JOKE OF THE DAY 27 May 2005

It was the first day of school; many new teachers and even more new
students, filled the building quickly.

As the principal made his rounds to check in on each class, he heard a
terrible commotion coming from one of the classrooms down the hall.

He quickly rushed down the corridor, opened the door where he heard the
noise coming from, & walked in.

Right away he spotted one boy, taller than the others, who seemed to be
making the most noise. Despite the boy's reluctance to move, the
principal seized the lad, dragged him to the hall, and told him to wait
there until he was excused. No and's, if's, or but's about it!

Returning to the classroom, the principal restored order and then
proceeded to lecture the class for half an hour about the importance of
good behavior.

"Now," he said," are there any questions befoe I leave?"

"One girl stood up timidly. "Please sir," she asked, "May we have our
teacher back?"

"Well, I don't see why not." Looking around the class, he says, "And...
just.... where... exactly... is your teacher?"

"He's the one out in the hall, sir."

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
gems from the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings
from great leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

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JOKE OF THE DAY 26 May 2005

Kathryn's 5-year-old developed a strong interest in spelling once she
learned to spell STOP. After that, she tried to figure out her own
words. From the back seat of the car she'd ask, "Mom, what does fgrpl
spell?"

"Nothing," Kathryn said.

Sitting at breakfast she'd suddenly ask, "Mom, what does doeb spell?"

"Nothing," Kathryn answered.

This went on for several weeks. Then one afternoon as they sat coloring
in her room she asked, "Mom, what does lmdz spell?"

Kathryn smiled at her and said, "Nothing, sweetheart."

The 5-year-old carefully set down her crayon, sighed and said, "Boy,
there sure are a lot of ways to spell Nothing!"

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
gems from the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings
from great leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
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18++
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JOKE OF THE DAY 25 May 2005

The Usual Way

I was on vacation in Vegas, playing the slot machines. It was my
first time in a casino, and I wasn't sure how the machines operated.

"Excuse me," I said to a casino employee. "How does this work?"

The worker showed me how to insert a bill, hit the spin button, and
operate the release handle...

"And where does the money come out?" I asked.

He smiled and motioned to a far wall before saying, "Usually at the
ATM."

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
gems from the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings
from great leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
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18++
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Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They
could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
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JOKE OF THE DAY 24 May 2005

Say It With Diamonds!

My nextdoor neighbor bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for
Valentine's Day.

I said to him, "I thought your wife wanted one of those pretty 4-
Wheel drive vehicles."

"She did," he replied. "But where in the world was I going to find a
fake Jeep!!"

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
gems from the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings
from great leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They
could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
subscribe at your own risk.

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JOKE OF THE DAY 23 May 2005

Armed For Defense

One day, Little Johnny visited a doctor for a vaccination. After the
doctor gave him an injection, he tried to bandage Little Johnny's arm.

"I think you'd better bandage the other arm, doc!", said Little
Johnny.

"But, why? I'm supposed to bandage the injected part of your arm to
let your friends know not to touch it."

"You really don't know anything about how my friends behave!"

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
gems from the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings
from great leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They
could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
subscribe at your own risk.

Join the 18++ mailing list @
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Or simply go Blogging @
http://18plusplus.blogspot.com/

********************** Legal Disclaimer ****************************
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