Thursday, January 03, 2008

JOKE OF THE DAY 4 Jan 2008

Floored!

A man and a woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress,
taking another order at a table a few paces away noticed that the man was
slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, with the woman acting
unconcerned.

The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of
sight under the table. Still, the woman dining across from him appeared calm
and unruffled, apparently unaware that her dining companion had disappeared.

After the waitress finished taking the order, she came over to the table and
said to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid
under the table."

The woman calmly looked up at her and replied firmly, "Oh no, My husband has
just walked in the door."


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WORTH READING
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18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They could
be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX. Statutory
Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it, subscribe at your own
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posted by Chirag at 5:50 PM 0 comments

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

JOKE OF THE DAY 3 Jan 2008

Digitless & Dejected
While cutting wood in his workshop, George slips and manages to slice all
his fingers off with the power saw. He screams and runs out of the workshop,
sprinting in considerable pain to the nearest hospital.

After a half-hour in the waiting room, a nurse finally emerges. "I'm sorry,
sir," she says, "but without your fingers, we can't do anything except stop
the bleeding. If you go back and get them, we can sew them back on."

Nodding dejectedly, George wanders out of the ER and comes back an hour
later.

"Did you find your fingers?" asks the nurse.

"Yes," replies George.

"Where are they?" asks the nurse.

"I couldn't pick them up off the floor," answers George.

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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
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leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
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wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @

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18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They could
be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX. Statutory
Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it, subscribe at your own
risk.

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posted by Chirag at 6:39 PM 0 comments

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

JOKE OF THE DAY 2 Jan 2008

China Toys

With the recent news of the high lead-content of toys made in China, the
Chinese government is moving swiftly to respond to the fears of American
consumers. Case in point, the extensive warning label on a toy I recently
purchased. It read as follows:

Happy Fun Ball
-only $14.95-

Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly and children under 10 should avoid
prolonged exposure to Happy Fun Ball.

Caution: Happy Fun Ball may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.

Happy Fun Ball Contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture,
should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.

Do not use Happy Fun Ball on concrete.

Discontinue use of Happy Fun Ball if any of the following occurs:
Itching
Vertigo
Dizziness
Tingling in extremities
Loss of balance or coordination
Slurred speech
Temporary Blindness
Profuse sweating
Heart Palpitations
If Happy Fun Ball begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and
cover head.

Happy Fun Ball may stick to certain types of skin.

When not in use, Happy Fun Ball should be returned to its special container
and kept under refrigeration.
Failure to do so relieves the makers of Happy Fun Ball, Wacky Products
Incorporated, and its parent company Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and
all liability.

Ingredients of Happy Fun Ball include an unknown glowing substance which
fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.

Happy Fun Ball has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is also
being dropped by our warplanes on Iraq.

Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.

Happy Fun Ball comes with a lifetime guarantee.

Happy Fun Ball ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES!


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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @

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Or simply go Blogging @

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18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They could
be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX. Statutory
Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it, subscribe at your own
risk.

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posted by Chirag at 6:14 PM 0 comments

JOKE OF THE DAY 1 Jan 2008

 
Adult v. Baby

A blonde holding a baby walks into a drug store and asks a clerk if she can use the store's free baby scale.

"Sorry, ma'am," says the clerk.

"Our baby scale is out for repairs. But we can figure the baby's weight if we weigh mother and baby together on the adult scale, and then weigh the mother alone, and subtract the second number from the first."

"Oh, that won't work," says the blonde.

"Why not?" asks the confused clerk.

"Because," says the blonde, "I'm not the baby's mother, I'm the aunt."


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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @   
http://quotationoftheday.blogspot.com/

WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @   
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18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They could
be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX. Statutory
Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it, subscribe at your own
risk.

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posted by Chirag at 1:21 AM 0 comments

Sunday, December 30, 2007

JOKE OF THE DAY 31 Dec 2007

Life With Father

John's dad picked him up from school to take him to a dental appointment.
Knowing that the parts for the school play were supposed to be posted that
day, he asked his son if he got a part.

John enthusiastically announced that he'd gotten a part. "I play a man who's
been married for twenty-five years!"

"That's great, son," said the proud dad. "Keep up the good work and before
you know it they'll be giving you a speaking part."

<Happy New Year\>

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @

http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @

http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @

http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They could
be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX. Statutory
Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it, subscribe at your own
risk.

Join the 18++ mailing list @

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Or simply go Blogging @

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posted by Chirag at 5:57 PM 0 comments