Thursday, October 13, 2005

JOKE OF THE DAY 14 Oct 2005

An eccentric philosophy professor gave a one question final exam after a
semester dealing with a broad array of topics.
The class was already seated and ready to go when the prof picked up his
chair, plopped it on his desk, and wrote on the board, "Using everything
we
have learned this semester, prove that this chair does not exist."

Fingers flew, erasers erased, blue books were filled in furious fashion.
Some
students wrote over 30 pages in one hour attempting to refute the
existence
of the chair. One member of the class however, was up and finished in
less
than a minute.

Weeks later when the grades were posted, the rest of the group wondered
how
he could have gotten an A when he had barely written anything at all.
What
did he write, they asked.

"What chair?"

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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

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Wednesday, October 12, 2005

JOKE OF THE DAY 13 Oct 2005

At dawn the telephone rings. "Hello, Senor Humphrey? This is
Ernesto the caretaker at your country house."

"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"

"Um, I am just calling to advise you, sir, that your parrot died"

"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"

"Si, that's the one."

"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What
did he die from?"

"From eating rotten meat."

"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"

"Nobody senor. He ate the meat of one of the dead horses."

"Dead horse? What dead horse?"

"The thoroughbred, Mr. Lucky. He died from all that work pulling the
water cart."

"Are you insane? What water cart?"

"The one we used to put out the fire."

"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"

"The one at your house! A candle fell and the curtains caught on
fire."

"What the.....!!! But there's electricity at the house!!!! What was
the candle for?"

"For the funeral."

"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL?!"

"Your mother's. She showed up one night out of the blue and I
thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Tiger Woods Nike
Driver."

SILENCE....................

"Ernesto if you broke that driver you're fired.!

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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
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from great leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @
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18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They
could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
subscribe at your own risk.

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Monday, October 10, 2005

JOKE OF THE DAY 11 Oct 2005

A young lady is out cycling down a country lane in a very rural
part of England. She's wearing a VERY skimpy pair of hot pants.

After about an hour of cycling she gets completely lost, so when
she see a farmer in field she stops and calls over to him.

"Excuse me, but is this the way to Wareham?"

"Oi donno miss, but they sure look nice as thay are!"

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
gems from the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings
from great leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @
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18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They
could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
subscribe at your own risk.

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JOKE OF THE DAY 10 Oct 2005

(A Father's Day Classic)

Ten Things You'll Never Hear A Dad Say

10. "Well, how 'bout that?... I'm lost! Looks like we'll have to stop
and ask for directions."

9. "You know Pumpkin, now that you're thirteen, you'll be ready for
unchaperoned car dates. Won't that be fun?"

8. "I noticed that all your friends have a certain 'up yours'
attitude ... I like that."

7. "Here's a credit card and the keys to my new car -- GO CRAZY!"

6. "What do you mean you wanna play football? Figure skating not good
enough for you, son?"

5. "Your Mother and I are going away for the weekend ... you might
want to consider throwing a party."

4. "Well, I don't know what's wrong with your car. Probably one of
those doo-hickey thingies -- you know -- that makes it run or
something. Just have it towed to a mechanic and pay whatever he asks."

3. "No son of mine is going to live under this roof without an
earring -- now quit your belly-aching, and let's go to the mall!"

2. "Whaddya wanna go and get a job for? I make plenty of money for
you to spend."

And the NUMBER ONE thing you'll never hear a dad say...

1. "Father's Day? aahh -- don't worry about that -- it's no big
deal."

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
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They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone.
But they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen
gems from the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings
from great leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @
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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words
of wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your
chance to question the priorities of existence and also to get their
answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They
could be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX.
Statutory Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it,
subscribe at your own risk.

Join the 18++ mailing list @
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/18PlusPlus
Or simply go Blogging @
http://18plusplus.blogspot.com/

********************** Legal Disclaimer ****************************
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