JOKE OF THE DAY 23 Apr 2009

A Genuinely Honest Resume

 

 

OBJECTIVE: To sit in a cubicle and stare at a monitor
for eight hours, occasionally looking attentive when approached by a
superior.

EDUCATION: School: Very Expensive
Major: Not Important
GPA: Don't Ask

EMPLOYMENT: NETWORK MANAGEMENT (9/96-Present)
Produced daily itinerary of television programs to watch. Duties
included changing channels, avoiding infomercials, and staying tuned
after those messages. DEBT CONSOLIDATION (4/97-12/99)
Using various tools such as credit cards and borrowed cash, I managed to
combine groups of unpaid bills into one monthly bill that goes straight
to my father. RESIDENT INHALER (9/98-6/99)
Assisted all students with chemical intake from purchasing to exhaling.

COMPUTER SKILLS: *Solitaire
*Minesweeper
*On/Off Repair Method

HONORS AND AWARDS: *First Place in Miller Lite Funnel Tournament
*Said Toast at brother's wedding
*High Score on Theta Chi's Pin Ball Machine
For further references, contact my mother. For positive responses,
please pose all questions as though you're considering me as a law
school applicant.
------------------------------------------------------------------
YOUR JOKE OF THE DAY, IS JUST A BLOG AWAY @   
http://joketimefolks.blogspot.com/
SUBSCRIBE/UNSUBSCRIBE FOR THIS MAILING LIST @    
http://groups-beta.google.com/group/JokeOfTheDay


ALSO PLAYING AT A MAILING LIST NEAR YOU ::

QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

Join the Quote A Day mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/QuotationOfTheDay
Or simply Blog it @   
http://quotationoftheday.blogspot.com/

WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

Join the Worth Reading mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/WorthReading
Or simply go Blogging @   
http://readingtimefolks.blogspot.com/

18++
----
Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They could
be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX. Statutory
Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it, subscribe at your own
risk.

Join the 18++ mailing list @
    http://groups-beta.google.com/group/18PlusPlus
Or simply go Blogging @   
   http://18plusplus.blogspot.com/