Thursday, March 12, 2009

JOKE OF THE DAY 13 Mar 2009

Car Horoscopes
 
To find out your car's astrological
sign - look for a sticker on the inside of the driver's side door that
gives you the exact month and year the car was manufactured.
Aries (April)
These cars are among the most reliable you can buy, but they do have
aggravating characteristics. They commonly have squealing brakes and may
be slow to start in the winter. Paint durability is not the best.
Taurus (May)
Taurean cars are strong, but cooling and electrical systems are
troublesome. Engines are more durable than most and withstand
considerable abuse. Heaters and air-conditioners are tip-top.
Gemini (June)
Cars manufactured under the sign of the twins tend to lead a dual life,
running flawlessly one day and sputtering the next. They are extremely
durable however and with a little elbow grease and mechanical know-how,
you can keep them on the road forever.
Cancer (July)
Cancer cars tend to be well-crafted and rarely develop squeaks, leaks or
rattles. On a low note, performance is middle of the pack and power
options are fickle.
Leo (August)
These cars tend to be unreliable and have engine, brake and suspension
woes. But they can be a good buy if the price is right and you do very
little driving. click here if you voted for Obama!
Virgo (September)
Cars built under the sign of Virgo are excellent highway cruisers but
perform poorly in stop and go traffic. Clutch problems are a real
nuisance. Best purchased with an automatic transmission.
Libra (October)
Libran cars are born to run and are top choices for hard-driving teens
and hot-rodders. Excellent paint, but leaks and rattles are a given for
autos made under the sign of the scales.
Scorpio (November)
These cars combine reliability, performance and durability to rate among
the best of all autos. They tend to guzzle more gas than other cars. But
they are still considered the "best-bet" for any driver.
Sagitarrius (December)
Sagittarian cars are timid performers regardless of engine size and are
slightly less reliable than average. The good news is these autos love
long trips, so they are best-suited for people who like to travel. But
beware, they tend to be sluggish in city driving.
Capricorn (January)
Look out! Shoddy interiors and premature tire wear mar these otherwise
strong performers. Reliable and responsive, Capricorn cars are a good
choice if you can afford to keep them in rubber. Play
Aquarius (February)
Aquarian cars are slick performers and are extremely reliable in the
short run. Rust can be a problem and dashboard readouts tend to be
inaccurate. These cars are a great buy for people who plan to trade in
for a new one every couple of years.
Pisces (March)
Piscean cars are the cream of the cop but require more maintenance than
most. Engines and transmissions are always strong performers and brakes
are flawless. These cars are an excellent choice for motorists who like
to tinker, visit auto parts stores and change their own oil.

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QUOTATION OF THE DAY
--------------------
They inspire, they motivate and at times they tickle your funny bone. But
they never miss to touch your heart. Your daily supply of chosen gems from
the world of literature, ancient proverbs, poetry and sayings from great
leaders.

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WORTH READING
-------------
Things they do not teach you at college! Life's puzzle unfolded. Words of
wisdom that motivate you to introspect and reflect. Here's your chance to
question the priorities of existence and also to get their answers.

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18++
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Indulge your dirty mind with some outright hilarious adult jokes. They could
be expletive or subtle but they are definitely rated - XXX. Statutory
Warning - 18++ may be injurious if your mommy sees it, subscribe at your own
risk.

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