JOKE OF THE DAY 12 Aug 2009

 Dear Milkman...
These are actual notes left for the milkmen across America and Great
Brtain: ~ "Please leave an extra pint of paralysed milk." ~ "Please
don't leave any more milk. All they do is drink it." ~ "Milkman,
please close the gate behind you because the birds keep pecking the tops
off the milk." ~ "Sorry about yesterday's note. I didn't mean one egg
and a dozen pints, but the other way round." ~ "Please knock. My TV's
broken down and I missed last night's The Office. If you saw it, will
you tell me what happened." ~ "When you leave my milk
knock on my bedroom window and wake me because I want you to give me a
hand to turn the mattress. ~ "Sorry not to have paid your bill
before, but my wife had a baby and I've been carrying it around in my
pocket for weeks." ~ "Milkman. please could I have a loaf but not
bread today." ~ "Please leave no milk today. When I say today, I mean
tomorrow, for I wrote this note yesterday."

~ "My daughter says she wants a milkshake. Do you do it
before you deliver or do I have to shake the bottle." ~ "Please send
me a form for cheap milk, for I have a baby two months old and did not
know about it until a neighbour told me." ~ "Milk is needed for the
baby. Father is unable to supply it." ~ "From now on please leave two pints every other day and one pint on the
days in between, except Wednesdays and Saturdays when I don't want any
milk." ~ "My back door is open. Please put milk in 'fridge, get money out of cup in drawer and
leave change on kitchen table in pence, because we want to play bingo
tonight." ~ "When you leave the milk please put the coal on the
boiler, let dog out and put newspaper inside the screen door. PS. Don't
leave any milk. ~ "No milk. Please do not leave milk at No. 14 either
as he is dead until further notice."

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